More grieving

Time to grieve some more. I went to a therapist who said it was better to cry thoroughly once in a while than to bottle it up. As I weep for you both I'm also awed that I should be privileged to call you mine. It also feels like I get to see Eternity from the future, in a way. We usually only get to think about our ancestors in Heaven. Love you both so much and am happy you are both well and strong again. Love, Mummy

Larissa's Journey

WOW! It took some doing to get back into my old blog. I hope it's okay to continue with this one, even though the name should probably be changed. 1 month ago today my second child, my oldest, also succumbed to cancer, at age 41. She leaves behind a beautiful, vivacious, imaginative and bright 6-year old daughter, Violet. I've been sleeping on the couch in her apartment since November and I know I was able to help her hang on longer than if I hadn't come but it's still a devastating blow. We were so SURE she would beat it! We listened to The Secret every day - sometimes several times a day - and were gradually getting her diet switched to Paleo to starve out the cancer but it was a classic tale of "too little, too late" and her body just gave out. Not without a fight, mind you, but now we know she was dying while we thought she was getting better. Through this journey I have met a lot of wonderful, supportive, loving friends of hers. She really impacted everyone she met in a powerful way. I had some really clever things I wanted to say on here but they seem to have flown my mind. Ah, well. Perhaps I'll try again another day.